We’d like you to meet four men.
They are ordinary men who grew up with a clear set of guidelines about how to act or react in certain situations. As you read their stories try, as they have done, to make sense of what’s happening in their lives. John was stopped one day by a traffic officer for speeding. He works as a sales rep so is out on the road a lot. He covers a lot of kilometers and at times makes a decision to exceed the speed limit. On this occasion, John felt really angry and was confused about how to respond when stopped and given a ticket.
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Children do not have to be themselves the victims of abuse to suffer from its effects.
They are also badly affected by seeing abusiveness between significant adults — parents, caregivers — and often develop some kind of health or behaviour problem as a result. Health problems may include bed-wetting, nervousness, stomach aches, headaches, nightmares and soiling. Common behaviour problems are truancy, stealing, disruptiveness and poor achievement. James came to counselling in a last-ditch effort to save his marriage. He had been abusive to his wife, Julie, and his two stepchildren. What James came to recognise was that he wanted to: |